Trick or Treat and Tired
October 26, 2009 JerseyGrins
It’s the day after Halloween. I wander out to the mailbox, chip off some dried eggshell, and prop my mums back up. Moving back to the front porch, I sweep up one pound of fluorescent pink silly string. Who knew Halloween could be so fun?
The Halloween fun actually begins two days before the big holiday. My son decides to prepare his Halloween costume—he will be the infamous “Hamburgler”. “How cute!” you think. “The little tyke is planning for the big day.” Actually, the little tyke is six foot one and shaves. He fails to realize that Halloween is on October 31st—much like the prior year, and the prior, and the prior.
So, my tyke and I go motoring off to the nearest party store. We see cashier lines fifteen people deep and empty racks that, at one time, held ghoulish costumes and monkey heads. Despite these challenges, my son finds a black gaucho hat, cool black gloves, and a vampire cape. Not surprisingly, the black and white striped jail shirts and pants are sold out. These, of course, are integral to the Hamburgler look.
Now we run next door to a discount store. We need a white shirt and pants! Also, a red tie embellished with hamburgers is a must. Brooks Brothers, perhaps? I doubt it.
Here is the next day’s scenario. Back to the discount store. Buy black electrical tape. Tape stripes on the white shirt. Run out of tape. Back to the discount store. Buy black electrical tape. Tape stripes on the pants. Need white ribbon trim for the gaucho hat. Back to the discount store. Buy white ribbon–plus two really, really cool skulls with red flashing eyes. Get out to the parking lot. Remember black mask. Back into the store for a mask. Repeat for several more hours.
Finally, Halloween night comes. I excitedly place my gruesome skulls on the front porch. My “spooky noise machine” is the piece de resistance—it emits low groans and soulful wails. Next, I race upstairs to don my costume. I transform from Mom to a Grecian goddess, complete with gold snaky arm bracelets and a laurel wreath. I line my eyes with a flair that would make Cleopatra jealous.
The big moment comes! As the doorbell rings, I grab candy and chips, assuming a goddess-like pose. One little bumble bee stares at me and cries, “Eoooooowwww!” A fairy princess asks me, “Are you being a witch for Halloween?”
The next three hours roll out like this. Take a bite of navy bean soup. Run to the door. Assume goddess stance. Hand out candy. Eat some candy myself. Pick up silly string. Run back to my soup. Run to the door. Eat more candy.
And so it goes. Is it Thanksgiving yet?
Entry Filed under: Grins and Giggles and tagged: It's That Time of Year!, Mothers
